Me not really understanding the game of basketball is much aligned to the time in my life that I really didn’t understand the game of American Football (Throwball I says), which was frustrating for the people who were trying to actually watch American Football on television with me in the room. My questions were endlessly tiring (to match my obsessive compulsive disorder (notice I didn’t abbreviate that?) I’m also painfully inquisitive) and were never really matched with a healthy response since I was asking questions to people that were busy doing something else entirely like watching a sporting event on a television, which usually requires at least a little bit of concentration. It was something akin to when you’re trying to have a conversation with a friend and a child says something like (keep in mind – I am not with child – I have no children – but, everyone can agree that this actually happens from time to time and I’m not just making this up nor do I find this action “annoying” for me personally, I’m sympathizing with the parent with which this is happening) “Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy.” That was me, trying to learn American Football.  

So, apparently there’s something going on this week that causes the amount of vasectomies in men to spike (true story) and I’m looking for people to learn me on this game of yours. It’ll be maddening.

 

 

Just kidding. I know all about the game of basketball. And, I hope everyone enjoys watching an insane amount of games over the next couple of days/weeks and we’ll be sure to try and show as many as we can at your favorite taproom.

 

If you’re not signed up for a vasectomy and you need to watch the games at work, please use the following links (save them in your bookmarks) as a kind of “boss button.” You’re welcome. Also, if you don’t know what a “boss button” is here’s a nifty thing online that basically shows you what it does. Anyway, use these if you want as the same thing: LINK 1 / LINK B / LINK TROIS / LINK THE FORTH BE WITH YOU.

 

 

 

In other news, tomorrow is a day where those that are Irish share their heritage with the rest of us and we should be eternally thankful for them for that; it’s a nice gesture to share your heritage with other people. Also, there’s a whole lot of funny/clever things that I’ve written in this space (it’s like a palimpsest – I write things and then I erase them because I think they’re going to offend people even though I’m just writing it to make people laugh and then I erase them magically (much easier than when I was using a typewriter for these things) and replace those words with those that are easier to digest) and erased them for the greater good of the greater good so I’m just going to say Happy St. Patrick’s Day to all that are celebrating and a mighty Éirinn go Brách to those that understand what that means.

 

In moving directly forward to talking about things pertaining to beer and not pertaining to hockey we should discuss something that is in our possession that I’m partly excited about (the best part of partly).

 

We got in sixty liters of Tipo Pils. As staunch readers of this digest you’ll all be on the remembering that I’m a very large fan of the Pilsner style of beer. As a former brewer (which, according to the BJCP makes me “always a brewer”) one of the most informative and relevant experiences that I had was my visit to Eastern Europe and the oversaturation that I gave myself of the style. Well, this is a really good Pilsner. Not that the Pilsners that we normally have aren’t worthy of mention; right now we have Lost Nation’s Vermont Pilsner, which is on the same hand when I’m counting with my fingers about my favorite Pilsners I’ve had the opportunity to try. It’s more the manner in which we receive the Tipo that sets it apart. You see, some of our beer is really local; if we wanted to (and if the Government would let us (HI GUYS!!!)) we could probably just drive to the brewery of your choice, watch them take the beer out of large tanks into smaller vessels and then be on our merry way(s). But we can’t do that with a brewery that’s in Italy. So here’s how they do it: the brewery (in Italy, the one that makes TipoPils) transfers their beer into these very large vessels some could call them tanks) that are all temperature controlled and pressure regulated. They are then put on a ship and that ship sails (not really, probably no sails on that ship) across the pond and to a long off land called “Connecticut.” Once it lands in that far off place the beer is then placed into sanitized kegs and then shipped to us and then we make it available for you. However, some times the trained folks in that far off land will manipulate (in a good way, like in the way that will further enhance the product in a good way) the beer just prior to the “keg” stage. In this case the TipoPils that arrived was dry hopped with fresh hops directly to the tank before the aforementioned “keg” stage. So, we have TipoPils, dry hopped. It’ll go on as soon as the very perfect timing has been achieved so that you’ll love us even more. That beer has come a long way, baby, and we’ll be sure to treat it as such.

 

Some of the other beers that you may or may not see (depending on how fast your jet pack is) on our taplines include but are not limited to the following:

 

  • Schilling Konundrum: firstly, you should know that the word “tart” should be placed in the description of this beer because you will also see the words “pale” and “ale” in there and I’d hate for you to judge this as a standard Pale Ale and then be all like, “this is bad, send it back” because it’s supposed to be tart. It’s been soured with resident bugs. It’s lovely.
  • Hill Farmstead Everett is within the walls and always worth mentioning because it’s a phenomenal American Porter. I’ve been trying to work the word “eponymous” into conversation lately, just to let you know.
  • Zero Gravity Omnibus is sure to please as it’s a 7.5% ABV American IPA with a whole bunch of hops (Simcoe/Zeus/Centennial) in it that you like because we made you like them with their likeability.
  • You can stop asking for Smuttynose’s Finest Kind as well since it’ll be on soon and then you can stop asking.
  • Farnum Hill Dooryard Cider is also on right now and will be a hearty temptress. It’s a naturally carbonated and fermented cider from New Hampshire and if there’s one thing in life that I like more than most other things it’s natural fermentation.

 

Well, that should just about do it for our time this week folks.

 

 

Don’t forget your shoes.

 

 

Cheers,

 

 

Secondseasonisalmostuponus Taproom