Call me crazy butt (crazy butt) but I’m having a hard time today not feeling a little mischievous. I have two beers that I get to talk to you about this morning (well, I have more than just two but these two have given me a thought about the blast as a whole that I cannot shake) that, in all intents and purposes, use what some would consider a curse word in their title. Now, these words are common vernacular, they are not extraneous words used out of anger or ignorance. They have multiple meanings on many levels and society has, at some point, made them into “curse” words. That said, if you are under 18 or so (is that ok? Should it be younger?), then you might want to censor these words until you learn that they are, in fact, words that are commonly used. So, I’ll wait until you’ve gained permission for me to use the words “bastard” and “bitches.” Oh wait…
Anyway, now that it’s just us, let’s talk about baseball. That seems like a good diversion. I hear that tonight there’s a pretty important game going on. We hope that your professional baseball team does well and we hope that you’ll come on down and enjoy the game with us. We’re fans of this ball game as it brings a great deal of excitement and camaraderie to our daily lives. Besides, you’ve already made the costumes for tomorrow night and you’re ready to watch some fastballs (just make sure you keep your hips and hands back for those curveballs – hips and hands and push it to the opposite field).
As for tomorrow night, we will be ready to receive you. We might even be dressed as well. Ok, we will. I hear there’s a dictator waiting to serve you craft beer. He might even have a cigar. You never know. That’s the great part of this experience of Halloween, there’s mischief and happiness all rolled into one.
So let’s get to those bitches and bastards. Here’s what’s either coming on soon or already on waiting for your mischievous ashtrays (censored for the young):
Founders Backwoods Bastard: this beauty is tasting f-i-n-e fine. This bastard is a Scotch Ale that’s been aged in (what else?) bourbon barrels. Intense yet so smooth.
Dogfish Head 2011 Bitches Brew: Originally made for the 40th anniversary of Miles Davis’ landmark album, this is a truly sensory experience. It’s more of an Imperial Stout but well, they went and brewed it with gesho root and blended it with a beer made from honey. In order to enhance the experience, I am suggesting that you look up said album (Miles Davis’ Bitches Brew) on your smarter than I phone and listen to the track entitled “John McLaughlin.” On second thought, listen to the whole album and sip that beer slow.
The Bruery Tart of Darkness: Wow. Just, wow. Imagine a stout that’s had its sugars lovingly eaten by a whole host of different souring bugs. Truly a wonder of nature this ever predator.
Hill Farmstead Twilight of the Idols: It’s on right now. Remember to press save before you run away from your computer to get here as fast as you can for this Winter Porter made with coffee and cinnamon and aged on vanilla beans.
Zero Gravity Smokey the Beer: this is a mirage of the Rauchbier style that turns out to be true. Your never ending quest to find the best Smoked Lager in the United States has ended.
Allagash James Bean: I should have spent the first part of this blast talking about coffee rather than taking you on some strange trip about two words that are probably not considered curse words by you after all. But, I digress. You all remember Allagash Curieux, right? That beautiful Belgian Style Tripel that’s aged in Jim Beam barrels? Well, picture that with, you guess it, coffee added. Crazy stuff.
Well, that’s just some of the teasers that we have planned for your Tricking and Cheering (that’s what it should be! Eureka!). You’ll just have to poke your head in to see what else we have up our sleeve. And, now I know what I’m dressing as for Halloween. Thank you.
The Amazingly Talented Mr. Three Penny, the Rogue Magician!